Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Some vulgar thoughts about my class project: a reconciliation

At first I was insulted and mad about my partner's accusations. But now I just think; well. What else could you ask of me? If you wanted your ideas implemented, don’t just suggest them. Tell me why they would work within our project. Persuade me. Otherwise, then I DO get the impression that it is my project and not ours. Because to me it seems like you are waiting for me to do the next thing. Also, I shouldn’t be insulted by that charge. That “This seems like your project, not ours. You’re taking too much control” thing? Well, so what? That’s what I want to do for a living. Create my ideas. I want to create and sell my ideas. I didn’t have total control. I didn’t want total control. I relegated ideas. You revamped the script. And it looked great. We used it. You’re drafting blog content. Sweet. But overall, yes. This is my fucking project. These are my fucking characters. This will be my. Fucking. Result. So fuck off. This is mine. You made it that way. You let me take control because you didn't step. up.

And this is how I’ll live. Nobody was like “Uh, Achilles? You mind not leading this charge? You’re lookin’ like a dick. Some of us want some glory. Ajax is a little pissy.”

Nobody was like “Hey, dude, you wanna knock that shit out Homer? Some other people want to write epic poems for the first time. Kthanx.”

I’m not Homer and I’m not Achilles, but whatever. Those guys didn’t care. They did what needed to be done. And so will I. At the risk of sounding like an asshole, I will take over the project that I created, and I will make it work. Thanks for helping me, thanks for reigning in my flagrant disregard for self editing, consistency, and my incredible oversight. Thanks for letting me down when I needed communication, commitment, and leadership. And thanks for apologizing. Now let’s get this fucking thing over with.

4 comments:

Austin said...

Two things:

This kind of attitude is exactly why you will make it in this industry and it only reaffirms how passionate and motivated you are about your passion.

Second, pray for some peace. I'm not implying that you're freaking out or anything. But just pray for patience and understanding. You're dealing with someone you obviously don't mix well with. Things probably won't change drastically. But you'll find it easier to deal with, or at least more manageable. It becomes this mantra in your head...and it works.

redneckzilla said...

Serenity now... Serenity now...

Thanks man. I prayed about it last now and today, honestly, it's just been better. Things have fallen into place a lot over the past 48 hours, thankfully. My partner and I are working on things in more productive ways.

Just some tryin' times y'all. Hopefully I've come out of the refiner's fire a better man. Or black. Will Smith.

Kelsie Lynn said...

I really hope you've come out black. A chocolate man.. oh yes.

People are just farts full stop. hope filming will go well later on. oo i should call gran

Lawsy said...

I really hate to say this. But when you get into the film program this is just going to happen over and over.

Because people just don't get it. But people are also learning...

So it's really not worth getting upset about. And it helps you figure out who you can really depend on.

 
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